


i wanna be praised from a new perspective

by orphan_account



Category: Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunter RPF
Genre: Drunk Texting, Fluff and Angst, Jealousy, M/M, Miscommunication, Mostly Fluff, Tags Are Hard, Text Messages, a lot of fluff, anywho, like a third of it is told in text messages, maybe a fourth?, stuff like that
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-04
Updated: 2014-04-04
Packaged: 2018-01-18 02:37:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,942
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1411840
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>—but leaving now would be a good idea.</p><p> </p><p>'“Michael told me what you said,” he remarked after a while. “About, you know. Loving me and stuff.”<br/>There was silence again, so tense it was very nearly palpable.<br/>“And I’m just really glad it’s mutual,” Dan concluded.'</p>
            </blockquote>





	i wanna be praised from a new perspective

**Author's Note:**

> dumb danvin that's basically consumed all my writing time the past day instead of the nano that i should be doing  
> even though it's bad and maybe a little out of character  
> oops
> 
> there's like? some parts in text messages and it should be pretty obvious who's sending what but the name in the brackets (like when it reads [SMS – 10:10 AM – Michael]) that's who's receiving it not sending it  
> ((that becomes clearer when like? gavin is sending messages to dan or michael i guess because of the names in the phones i guess i don't know i just thought i'd clarify))
> 
> (((((yeah the title and part of the description is p!atd lyrics i was at a loss for a title and that's a jam bye)))))
> 
> also psa i wrote this before i knew gavin was living in a converted shed and not a room in their house i'm sorry

RTX had been, least to say, an absolute success – so the obvious conclusion was for everyone to head down to one of the local favorite bars and get positively smashed in the afterparty once closing ceremonies had come and passed and everything had simmered down. Groups had segregated, clearer defined the drunker everyone got; that was usually how it worked. There were groups and clusters of friends within the company and while they mixed and crossed a good deal, they were generally more definable once people got settled down and comfortable.

For the majority of the first half of the night, Gavin and Dan had been joined at the hip. Gavin was _so_ overjoyed to have the other there, after months of separation, and to be able to share something so huge and exciting with him had the gangly Brit beside himself with excitement. And Dan, obviously, he was pretty excited, too – he’d wanted to spend as much time with Gavin as possible, but as they started speaking to other people and having a little more and more to drink, before Dan knew it, they’d been separated completely.

That was about when the alcohol set in. Or rather, it was more being taken in than setting in.

Gavin had other friends. Dan knew that, he was cool with that. He liked it, even, because it meant that Gav was happy and left with more options than just a friendship that was usually entirely too long-distance. But something sat wrong with him – it had for a very long time, really, and it only got worse when he began to slap reluctant labels on it – something sat wrong with him when Gavin got all touchy-feely with Michael.

Because really, when he was drunk, Gavin was _all over_ Michael. And none of it was too bad, but it was every damn time Dan looked over – his chin on Michael’s shoulder while they looked at something on his phone, or their knees touching and bumping at each other as they sat and they laughed at some wonderful joke Dan would probably get the old “you’d have to have been there” treatment over, or his hand curled into a fist around the hem of Michael’s shirt as they weaved their way through the crowd. And Dan knew exactly what label to slap on it. Dan was jealous as hell over Gavin.

He stifled it with alcohol – that usually did the trick but when it was now Michael who Gavin couldn’t be separated from ( _like usual_ , much to Dan’s dismay) and it was all he saw when he looked over at his best friend, it didn’t help a lot. People weren’t great distractions, either, especially since everyone else had groups they were fonder of and conversations would usually end in favor of someone breaking off to join them.

He resolved at last to veer back over to Gavin; couldn’t hurt, after all, to try and return to the group. He was usually more than welcome, but it usually took a few drinks in his system to be able to stomach it when Gavin was getting like this around Michael. All touchy-feely and “wow, we’re such good friends, I’m so drunk that all I’m going to do is emphasize that point constantly around my best friend who’s actually super jealous that I seem to like you more than him” (as Dan so eloquently put it in his head) and _other_ reasons Dan felt sick to his stomach when Gavin got like this. But he still just wanted to be around his B.

As he meandered close enough to catch conversation – and at this point, he wished he hadn’t – he could catch snippets of things. One of which stopped him dead in his tracks: _“Yeah, of course, you’re my best friend, Micoo’.”_

Right. Lovely. Dan groaned – he was too drunk to try to deal with this but not anywhere near drunk enough to be able to. A weird oxymoron of sorts. The point was, it was about time for him to make his leave, he decided. The hotel was close anyways; only about a block or two away, if he recalled, and definitely within walking distance. So he downed the last of his drink and made his way for the door.

He’d nearly made it by the time Gavin caught sight of him – the older Brit had been keeping an eye on him the whole time, casting glances constantly over, part of him dying to drag him over and keep him close again but the better half of him keeping him put when he saw how many people Dan was talking to. Ever the busy one, with such a wide variety of company, and surely he wouldn’t want to be bothered. So Gavin would stick with his other best friend.

He didn’t like seeing Dan wandering off towards the door, though. It was barely 11, there were hours left before the place would start kicking anyone out, and there was no need for them to be crashing yet. Yeah, he was a bit tired too, but between energy drinks he knew Dan had consumed an equal amount of and the exhilaration of it all, there was still life in him yet. So it worried him to see Dan leaving so early. Worse yet, without saying a word to him.

“I’ll be right back,” he said, standing and leaving Michael’s side for the first time since he’d left Dan’s. Honestly, he’d been hoping Dan would follow and join them, especially considering how much everyone loved him, but he seemed busy with lots of other people who admired him greatly and that was just fine. Dan deserved to have fun.

Weaving through the crowd – not the easiest feat, necessarily – Gavin tried his damnedest to keep close behind Dan and catch up with him. But by the time he managed to get within ten feet of him, they were both already out the door.

“B?” he called, picking up the pace to something of a sloppy jog. Dan grimaced – thank god his back was to the other.

“Hey, B.”

“Where are you going?”

“’m tired.” It wasn’t really the truth – he wasn’t quite ready to sleep at all but it might be preferable to staying back there. Especially considering that at this rate, he was going to drink himself into an early grave.

“Ahh, come on, it’s still way too early. Come back to the party.”

Dan was quiet, pace unchanged, and Gavin’s expression wavered.

“Hey, B, come on – what’s wrong?” He reached out, catching Dan’s hand in his own, and that was the last straw. With startling momentum, the younger tugged his hand away, and both stopped dead in their tracks.

“What’s wrong? Gav, you’ve been joined at the hip with Michael all night.” Dan didn’t think he did a terribly good job of keeping the frustration out of his voice, and the expression on Gavin’s face only served to prove that. “And don’t get me wrong, I’m really glad you have friends here in Austin because god knows I can’t be here for you, but I didn’t necessarily expect to be left in the dust altogether, you know?”

“Dan, that’s not—”

“No, let me finish, I’m not done.” He’s stern, and Gavin fell silent completely for it. Good – he’d regret it in the morning but he needed to say something uninterrupted for once. “I hate seeing you happier without me. I want you to be in a good way, Gav, but I don’t want to feel like you’d be better off without me in the picture – which, hell, that might be the case, maybe I should take off for good, but that doesn’t mean I want to see it. And I don’t want to hear that I’m not your best friend anymore, because god damn, does that kill.”

That wasn’t the case at all – honestly, just because Michael was his best friend now, didn’t mean Dan wasn’t. Ray was, too, and hell, Geoff, even as something of a pseudo-father to him, fell into that category. But that never meant Dan fell out of it. If anything, he’d always be favored most. But he kept barreling on, effectively keeping Gavin silent.

“And you know what? I bloody love you, you idiot, probably with everything I’ve got. And that’s exactly why I can’t sit here and be brushed off like this.” He was done then, he decided, heart racing from anger and sadness and frustration and even something of embarrassment when he realized what he’d said towards the end. But hell, there was no taking it back now – he’d decided a long time ago that all of it was a fervent ardor for Gavin. He could handle the affections not being reciprocated, really, because he’d convinced himself that was the case. He was content with being around him and making him happy. But he couldn’t handle practically being cut off completely.

“Dan, you’re—”

“Yeah, I know, I’m overreacting. I’m dumb. I’m pretty pathetic, too. Anything else you want to add?”

Gavin couldn’t bring himself to speak. He felt sick, honestly. Or maybe a little heartbroken. Or both – both worked.

“Goodnight, B.”

**

[SMS – 11:49 PM – B] b i’m so sorry  
[SMS – 11:58 PM – B] are you gonna come back  
[SMS – 12:14 AM – B] god da mn im so sorry im suc han idiot  
[SMS – 12:27 AM – B] yo uprobbaly desreve a better freind than m e? but i di nt want to l ose you  
[SMS – 12:41 AM – B] da n im s or yr  
[SMS – 01:02 AM – B] b

**

Michael shifted the car into park, stopped just at the end of the walk from Ryan’s front door. He probably shouldn’t have been driving – very likely he was just over the legal limit – but he could hold his liquor and he had been Ryan’s ride there and he owed him a way back. And it wasn’t like they had crashed or anything, so he decided he was in the clear.

“Thanks for the ride,” Ryan remarked, letting the buckle wind back as he checked for all his things. Phone, wallet, keys – he wasn’t terribly drunk, either, and he seemed to be in good shape.

It was a different story for the gangly Brit passed out in the back seat, however, his hoodie draped over him like a blanket as he sprawled out horizontally across the seats and his t-shirt marred with alcohol and a lot of his own tears.

“Do you wanna take him?” Michael asked, gesturing to the back. He had no problem letting Gavin crash on his couch, but Ryan probably had more room and it was worth a shot, at the very least. “I don’t really wanna go barging through Geoff’s house with that drunk dumbass, honestly, I think he should just crash with one of us.”

“Nah.” Ryan shook his head. “Sorry, but I don’t want to have to explain that in the morning. And he’s actually slept on your couch before – I think he’d probably prefer to wake up in a familiar environment, you know?”

Michael snorted. “Knowing how Gavin gets when he’s drunk, I’m pretty sure he’s used to being in some weird as fuck places when he wakes up.”

Rolling his eyes, Ryan opened the door. “See you tomorrow, Michael. Thanks for dropping me off.” And with that the door thumped shut and Ryan was off for his door, Michael only lingering to make sure he got in alright before taking off once more.

**

It was no easy feat getting Gavin into the apartment. It wasn’t like he was really conscious – that would be a real treat to explain to the night shift security guard in the morning. He could just hear the questions already: “Why were you carrying some passed out man on your shoulder last night?”

Michael was, much to his distaste, pretty short. At least, in relation to Gavin he was. But he wasn’t strong, and Gavin, despite his height, didn’t _actually_ have a ton of mass to him, and in the end it wasn’t as difficult of a trek as Michael had originally anticipated. It was, though, a relief to get him off his shoulders and sprawled out on the couch – on his side, of course, in case he wound up vomiting in his sleep, because honestly, Michael would rather face cleaning that up than the alternative. And finally, _finally_ , Michael was off to bed. And really, after all that, rest was pretty sorely needed.

**

[SMS – 10:08 AM – Dan] so you wanna explain what the fuck happened between you and gavin?

[SMS – 10:10 AM – Michael] I’m sorry?  
[SMS – 10:11 AM – Michael] Please don’t worry about it Michael it was nothing

[SMS – 10:13 AM – Dan] well gee i dunno that sure sounds like a load of bullshit  
[SMS – 10:17 AM – Dan] considering that after you left he just got progressively drunker and sadder till i had a shitfaced british asshole bawling on my shoulder about how stupid he is and how he’ll never get to see you again (and maybe i shouldn’t say this but there were definitely a few instances of “i love him so much” thrown in there) till he basically cried himself to sleep  
[SMS – 10:18 AM – Dan] i had to wring my fucking shirt out i wasn’t even aware the gangly little prick could hold so much water in him  
[SMS – 10:18 AM – Dan] but tl;dr it doesn’t sound like nothing to me

[SMS – 10:22 AM – Michael] Shit  
[SMS – 10:23 AM – Michael] Where is he? Is he okay?

SMS – 10:25 AM – Dan] geoff’s now probably? i drove him back there like fifteen minutes ago before i went to the office  
[SMS – 10:26 AM – Dan] he’s just gonna stay there i think i mean he’s entirely too hungover to function let alone even consider working  
[SMS – 10:28 AM – Dan] what the fuck did you say to him? because i have never seen him like that in my life and yeah i might not have known him as long as you but that’s still saying a hell of a lot

[SMS – 10:31 AM – Michael] I fucked up Michael  
[SMS – 10:32 AM – Michael] Oh god I have to go talk to him

[SMS – 10:34 AM – Dan] you fuckin better

**

[SMS - 10:39 AM - B] B? Can I come over?

[SMS - 10:50 AM - B] dont bother

SMS - 10:52 AM - B] What if I’m already halfway there?

[SMS - 10:58 AM - B] i wont let you in  
[SMS - 11:04 AM - B] and dont text while you drive idiot

**

[SMS - 11:07 AM - Michael] There’s no way he’s going to talk to me  
[SMS - 11:08 AM - Michael] Oh god oh g od Michael I’ve fucked up so bad please help me

[SMS - 11:10 AM - Dan] first of all calm down have you even tried yet what did he say

[SMS + 1 attachment - 11:13 AM - Michael] see

[SMS - 11:16 AM - Dan] okay well a) griffon would probably answer the door anyways don’t listen to him he’s being a dumbass  
[SMS - 11:17 AM - Dan] b) he's clearly concerned about you if he's telling you not to text and drive so i would probably call that a good sign  
[SMS - 11:17 AM - Dan] and c) i’ll talk to him you just get over there or some shit

**

[SMS - 11:20 AM - Gav] dude just fucking talk to dan

[SMS - 11:28 AM - Micool] dammit michael stay out of this

[SMS - 11:29 AM - Gav] no okay fuck you i don’t know what he said but this guy is absolutely beside himself  
[SMS - 11:30 AM - Gav] he is so mad at himself and so scared and so worried about you and you’re making it worse just fucking TALK TO HIM  
[SMS - 11:32 AM - Gav] because you know what he cares about you so much and i know you care about him you were on and on last night about how great he is and how much you love him and it’s like? dude i fuckin know literally EVERYONE knows you two are so fucking in love i want to throw up and i’m not gonna let you shit all over that because you’re being a hungover diaper baby?  
[SMS - 11:33 AM - Gav] talk to dan

[SMS - 11:37 AM - Micool] fuck ing hell

**

Texas weather was by no means cold, but even as he waited at the Ramsey household front door, Dan found himself with his arms around his torso, shifting his weight from foot to food as he hugged himself nervously like he was trying to protect himself from the elements. If anything, he was trying to stave off trepidation and concern.

He’d knocked maybe five minutes ago –there was every chance Griffon wasn’t home, and Gavin was going to go on ignoring him, and that scared him. To the point that the worry bubbling up in his stomach very nearly made him sick. When no response came for a minute or two more, he tried again.

The response this time was near instantaneous, the door opening in maybe thirty seconds, Griffon on the other side. She looked like she’d been working – that explained a lot.

“Hi – sorry, I was hauling some things into the garage. You’re here for Gavin, yeah?”

Dan swallowed hard. He felt like a little kid asking his friend’s mother for permission to see them. “Yeah.”

Griffon nodded, standing back and letting him in. “Down the hall – his is the second door to the right.”

“Thank you.” A display of gratitude, Dan nodded gently and began to take his leave for Gavin’s room, but Griffon stopped him.

“Hey, Dan?”

He turned to face her. “Yeah?”

“Be nice to him. He had a really rough night – from what I hear it was a lot more than just getting smashed after RTX.”

Guilt washed over Dan’s face and he nodded. “Yeah, I know.”

The hallway was fairly dark – not too bad, but he found it to his advantage to turn the light on anyways rather than squinting in the poor lighting. Griffon had long since disappeared back to the garage, which might, at the very least, make talking to Gavin easier without feeling he was viable to get chewed out for treating him like shit at any given moment.

When he reached Gavin’s door, he knocked gently. “Hey B?”

There was a beat of silence, and then, “What?”

“Can I come in?”

This time, no response came, and he wound up resting his forehead on the door, form slouching in defeat.

“I’m sorry,” he tried, doing his best to keep _too_ much heartache out of his voice. “I fucked up, B, I shouldn’t have gotten mad about that, but I was drunk, and honestly I wasn’t thinking straight, and I’m really sorry. I’m not mad or upset about anything. I didn’t really mean anything I said.”

There was a moment of silence, and Dan was about to ask if Gavin had heard him, before the other spoke up again, sounding just a bit more despondent than before.

“I figured.”

 _Ahh, shit. Way to go, dumbass, you worded that completely wrong._ “I mean—some things. But I don’t—” Fuck.

Sucking in a deep breath, Dan steeled himself, voice slower and softer this time. Almost defeated.

“Michael told me what you said,” he remarked after a while. “About, you know. Loving me and stuff.”

There was silence again, so tense it was very nearly palpable.

“And I’m just really glad it’s mutual,” Dan concluded. It didn’t surprise him when all that followed was silence, but much to his confusion he was certain he heard the rustling of fabric from behind the door. And without warning it gave way, opening up, and he very nearly collapsed onto Gavin – who, honestly, wasn’t looking his best. Wrapped in the blanket in his bed and clad in an over-sized hoodie and some sweatpants (hardly the nicest but, at the very least, clean and not his clothes from the night before, and, honestly, pretty damn cute.)

The older winced at the light that flooded in the second the door was open and Dan was quick to turn the hall light off, fumbling blindly against the wall behind him before he succeeded. He stood, nervous, looking remarkably like a scolded child, but, to his relief, Gavin didn’t look terribly upset.

“It’s mutual?”

“Yes.” Dan choked out a relieved laugh. “ _Yes_ , very, it’s _very_ mutual.”

For a moment, it didn’t look like Gavin knew how to respond – his expression softened, but he looked a little lost for words, before he spoke up at last.

“Do you want to come in?”

Dan nodded eagerly – and quickly tried to retract it with a far less eager nod, and it was clear Gavin was trying his damnedest not to laugh. He stepped back, letting the younger in, and gently shut the door behind him.

Gavin’s room was dark, but surprisingly well-kempt, only a few clothes scattered here and there. There was a bedside lamp, and an overhead light, but he expected both hurt too much to have on right now. And though his eyes struggled to adjust to the dark, he was far more concerned that Gavin be comfortable and happy, especially in his own room.

They stood there for a moment – honestly Dan had no idea what to do but he opened his arms weakly, a half-hearted attempt to coax Gavin into them, and the other wasted no time collapsing forward and slumping against him. Without missing a beat, Dan had his arms tight around him, holding him close to his person, and Gavin’s fists balled up in the other’s shirt, hanging on tight. And ever so gently, he placed a kiss to the top of Gavin’s head.

“’m sorry I’m a prick.”

“You’re not a prick,” Gavin dismissed, speech muffled in Dan’s shoulder. “I’m a prick. I shouldn’t have left you alone – I have to stop taking you for granted. You deserve a hell of a lot better.”

“Nah.” Dan couldn’t help but smile. “There isn’t a hell of a lot better than you.”

With a soft little noise, Gavin held on tighter, very clearly trying not to gush over the other’s words, and Dan placed another kiss to his temple.

After a long, dragged out silence, Gavin cleared his throat. “Do you – um. Want to lay down or something? I mean, I’m not about to be doing much else.”

Expression softening, smile getting significantly fonder, he nodded. “Yeah.”

Only then did Gavin separate, reluctantly releasing his grip on Dan’s shirt till his hands dropped away all together, and Dan took the opportunity to take one of the other’s hands in his own.

Gavin plonked down first – hardly graceful, and all but collapsing back onto the bed, it was quite the feat to wrestle his blanket from around his shoulders, but he managed, and Dan took the time to kick off his shoes before crawling over Gavin to collapse on the other side. There was a stretch of silence, Dan’s hand coming to rest atop Gavin’s, and after just a moment of hesitation, the older pulled it away in favor of rolling over and curling up against Dan’s side, blanket draped over them both. Dan wasted no time wrapping him up in his arms and ducking down – with some effort – to kiss the top of his head again.

“I love you, B.” It was nice to say it properly.

“I love you too.”


End file.
